Tuesday, November 9, 2010

Hard

Hard is dropping my 2 year old off in the infant class at church because he can't walk or crawl on all fours.



Hard is not knowing what the future holds for Price. Will he walk, will he talk, what will it look like?



Hard is not knowing what his little voice sounds like because he doesn't talk. Not hearing mama.



Hard is the heartbreak I feel everytime we are somewhere "normal" like the park. Instead of focusing on what he can do I tend to dwell on the cannot's.

Hard is the guilt I feel even though it's irrational. Did I do something wrong?



Hard is watching every other 2 year old who is developing normal. That's what Price should be doing I sometimes think...that's what 2 year olds are like.



Hard is this road that we have no choice but to walk down. I would give ANYTHING for life to not be so stinkin hard for my boy.

Hard is battling the fear concerning Street's development. I should be enjoying every minute of his baby stage but I'm not.

Hard is knowing my baby is capable of so much more...if only his body would let him.



Hard are so many other things happening in this world and in the life of friends and family.



Hard but good is our blessed life. He didn't say it would be easy. When I want to throw myself a pity party I am reminded of just how blessed we are. Things could be so much harder. It doesn't always make it easier though.



I was watching a video by Matt Chandler about prayer and it spoke to me. The Bible says to labor in prayer. I definitely know what that means now. Labor is hard- it's sweat and tears. The Lord wants us to bother him with prayer. Bothering I am definitely doing. Please Lord hear our prayers.



{sorry for the downer post...it's just my heart...i've never been one to fake it}

10 comments:

Melanie said...

I appreciated this post Kristin so much. Hang in there!

The Wells Family said...

praying for HIS strength mama! you are doing such an amazing job with the sweet children the Lord has entrusted you with! hope to see you soon....

The Wells Family said...

praying for HIS strength mama! you are doing such an amazing job with the sweet children the Lord has entrusted you with! hope to see you soon....

The Fab 4 said...

Wonderful post...hang in there! Praying for your sweet boy..and you! :)

Lindsay Wagner said...

joining you in prayer with tears in my eyes......i know it's been a tough road, but please know you aren't walking it alone...we're here beside you in prayer

Tabaitha Kaye said...

I just wish I could reach out and hug you and pray with you right now. I'm praying for you and your precious boy Price.

The Ward's said...

Prays for you and Price. He is so lucky to have you for a mom!

Kiki said...

Life is hard. But God is good. I know you know that. Labor in prayer, that is a great analogy. Praying for you, friend.

Amanda said...

Thank you for not faking it. I love you and am praying for you.

Amber Cessac said...

Kristen, I work in the Preschool at HFBC and pop over to your blog every now and then from Amanda's. I hated sending you to drop Price off in the infant room a couple Wednesday nights ago. It really killed me and I didn't want to do it. I knew through your smile that it was hard for you. I haven't seen him back since then on Wednesdays, but we love him. He would be just fine in our young walkers class. I'm sorry you're going through this, we are all praying for you and sweet Price.

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